Adventures With My Menstrual Cup

Posted on May 18th, 2015

by Harshita Mehta

Stories and Experiences

I first heard about menstrual cups from a co-passenger during a train journey. I thought it was an amazing invention and wanted to get my hands ( and periods) on it immediately. I was so excited since I would no longer have to use the plastic – coated sanitary pads that I was using all these years. I was always worried about the chemicals from them affecting my vagina and felt responsible for participating in its accumulation in landfills. Luckily for me, my sister was living in Germany at that time and I got my pretty pink cup delivered to me in no time. This marked the beginning of my mooncup adventures.

Having bought the cup impulsively, I was obviously in for a surprise. I had no clue how to fold it, insert it or remove it. For the first few times, I kept pressing it towards my vagina hoping that it would get sucked inside magically. I had absolutely no clue about where it had to be inserted. This kept happening for a few months with me trying to insert it into all sorts of wrong places. Frustrated, I would push it inside only to howl and jump around my room in agony. What was I doing wrong? After these failed attempts, I simply abandoned my poor little cup, albeit for a short period only.

A few months later, I decided to try my luck again. This time however, I vowed to do more research and to be careful in avoiding self – inflicted pain. I watched videos and read some blogs. Armed with this knowledge, I rushed to the bathroom the next time I got my periods. The first thing I did was to insert my middle finger into my vagina to feel where my cervix was located. It was really scary venturing into such unknown anatomical territory. Somebody on YouTube had said that it would feel like the tip of your nose and rightly so. My finger then got quite bloody and I felt strangely happy when I realized that mine was higher up. This was the most invaluable tip since now that I knew the dynamics inside, insertion would prove to be quite a simple affair. I then crafted the cup into a rose bud form and slowly pushed it in. I was worried that it might pop open midway and hurt my vaginal walls, causing me what I suspected would be unprecedented torment; but nothing of that sort happened. The cup couldn’t wait to get in and embrace my insides.[inlinetweet prefix=”” tweeter=”” suffix=””] The sound of it popping up and saying hello to my insides had me overjoyed. [/inlinetweet]Woohoo!

I had this silly grin on my face for the rest of day. I even thought that my cup of green tea smiled back at me. Sadly however, this excitement was short – lived as it is with most other things in life. The dreaded period of its removal was now upon me. I tried to calm myself down and started tugging at it slowly. I squeezed it, twisted it and tried to pull it out but the damned thing wouldn’t budge. I tried to push it out with all my might but this sucker (pun intended) had its tentacles fastened firmly inside. I then gave one final push imagining giving birth to baby and lo and behold, it flew straight out of me! Since it had no parachutes attached, it sped right down the toilet hole! My precious had drowned and I had to rescue it somehow. I had to take swift action before it would eventually enter the sea (à la Finding Nemo). Desperate times call for desperate measures as they say and so I did something I would never have imagined myself doing. I put my hand down the toilet hole to retrieve it. The day was turning out to be one Indiana Jones of an adventure indeed. I closed my eyes to avoid seeing myself do it and prayed that I would pull it out without all that additional slug. Breathe in. Breathe out. I gradually opened my eyes to see my hand clasping this prodigal son of a moon cup.

Nowadays, I am pleased to report, using the cup is no longer the adventure it once used to be as I have now mastered the technique. I am a self proclaimed cup guru now and God knows I could take a bow!

Author: Harshita Mehta